turn your head and cough

today i'm being thrown from the frying pan into the fire; tossed to the wolves; burning in nebacudnezzar's fiery furnace. wait, that's a different metaphor. the point is, my coworker leslie's grandma died unexpectedly yesterday afternoon, so it's up to me to do the clinic visits for the next two days. if the family asks where leslie is, though, i won't say that her grandma died. i'll say that she "passed away" or "passed on." or maybe just "leslie's grandmother passed." you can't say died anymore.

so, though i'd planned to say "i'm not really comfortable doing these visits until i officially have the position," there's no way i can do that now. you can't be a bitch when you're filling in for someone who's had a death in the family.

i'm nervous about these clinic visits. it's not that i don't think i can do them; i'm sure i can. the problem is, i'm going to have my boss breathing down my neck the entire time, nitpicking every detail. as i told hilary on the shuttle this morning, it's not like i'm gonna kill this kid. i could, however, bring the entire study to a crashing, bloody, screeching halt. feel the power.